Wherever we go, we have the potential to make lasting impressions. During this season of our life with a new baby, we have been experiencing the love of so many people. Most people who stop and ask about Tyler have made positive lasting impressions on us. The kindness they have shown has been incredible. From the sweet woman at CVS who gave us tons of clothes and baby gear when she saw me with a new baby, to the very kind couple in Barnes and Noble who ooohed and ahhhed and told David and I that Tyler was the “perfect combination” of David and I, we have been blessed by so many people willing to step out and make an impression.
Which makes me think….
One afternoon, David and Maddy and Tyler and I went shopping. While we were in Lowe’s, I carried Tyler and everyone (and really, I mean everyone) had to stop and peek at the baby and tell me how adorable he was, or smile at us and look like we were just the coolest thing….it got to be almost funny. And we were in there for about an hour. (You know how that quick trip to the hardware store goes….)
Our next stop was Ingles Market, it is our favorite grocery store, and I was tired. I was going to sit in the car with Tyler, but Maddy said, “Oh Mom, let me carry him, I can wear the sling…..please come in with us!” Since she is 16 and more than capable, I said yes. So in we go. Through the store.
Not one person oooohed. Not one person made eye contact with Maddy and smiled. No one commented on how cute Tyler is. The lasting impression that was made was not positive.
So here is what we came away with….
People were sweet and kind to David and I. People went out of their way to not even look at Maddy with the baby.
When people stop and tell us how cute, adorable, precious, tiny, beautiful, wonderful….etc, that Tyler is, our heart swells. It adds to our sense of “we are doing something right….we are raising a totally wonderful baby” (even though at this point, it really is all about his cuteness, this is what these compliments do to us).
So, don’t you think that this is something that a young mom needs to hear, too? (even if they are really just the baby’s sister??) Does’t everyone need to hear that their child is precious? Especially if they may be stretched to the limit while taking care of their sweet little one…(as we all are at some point!)
When I am out I try to share in the excitement and joy of a new birth. It is not for me to place judgments on the circumstances, or a mom’s age, but it is up to me to be a positive, loving example to her.
I am making a lasting impression.
I really want the impression that I make to be a good one.
So, what do you think? What kinds of impressions do you remember most?
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Awesome post, thanks for sharing!
Very thought provoking. I must say I might sometimes be guilty of judging the teen mom or whom I perceive to be a teen mom when really I should be showing her love and compassion because her job is extra hard. I can’t imagine raising a child at 16, geez not even at 25
Lots of love to you guys.
Very eye-opening, Kym. I agree with Stacia–even in a much more “tolerant” day and time than that in which you and I grew up, people are still much too quick to pass judgment on others when they don’t know the reality of their situation. I have a saying that I coined a long time ago, to the effect of “Never criticize your brother for where he is in life, because you never know where God brought him from to get him there!” Non-judgmental love and compassion are what we as Christians need to demonstrate at all times, because who knows but what that teen mom might be an angel in disguise, as the scriptures teach us!
I might add that, while of course being a teenage Mom is not the best choice, (actually, I should say that sex before marriage is the wrong choice) in our day and age, a 16 year old girl with a baby could easily have chosen to kill her child with the endorsement of parents, teachers, and counselors. I am grateful for a young woman that chooses to give her baby life! And we should, as Christians, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE young, single moms! Thank you for the post, Kym. Love you!
Thanks, Donna…I wanted to comment on the way we can encourage each other, and what a difference that makes…to me and to each of us! Reading the comments on this post have encouraged me. I think too often we focus on the negative, and forget that we are all sinners ( I know you get this! (: ) and then, we use our preconceived notions of right and wrong to not be kind. I like what Lisa says, because we DON’T know the circumstances…like in Maddy’s case, she was the sister. And in a teenage mom’s case, I have seen so many situations that are NOT what they would seem…and the mom and the baby NEED our love and our encouragement. Thanks for both of you for being people who encourage!
WOW! Excellent point – I am sure I’ve been guilty of this before, not on purpose, but nonetheless guilty. Very well said and eye-opening. Every mother, no matter their age, needs to hear how precious her gift is.
Thanks for opening my eyes.
I read about your recent adoption on Tracies blog.
This posting hit home for me as my sister just gave birth to her first baby at 21 and she is single. She has had people treat her like scum because of her “unwed” status and not welcome her into their church family. Other people and churches have embraced her and supported her. I realize that the best idea is to have children when you are married and I support that but once someone is pregnant I think we should support them and not just pass judgement. Thank you for the words you wrote they brought encourage to my heart as well as sadness for the mothers who just receive just judgement.
Heather,
My heart goes out to your sister. How sad it is that we as Christians embrace so much of the world….and not each other. Through our adoption process I was brought into relationships with so many people that I would never have met otherwise. Several of them are unwed moms. To watch them blossom and care for their children under circumstances that are beyond difficult was a real joy to me. I have never been so impressed. I realized that with encouragement, we give a gift that goes so far. Thanks for reading my blog and God Bless you and your sister!
Hi Kym,
I hope you will drop by my blog sometime to visit! I am your newest follower on your blog and on Twitter (my Twitter user name is Twittle__Dee) Looking forward to following you!
I loved reading this blog! Let me say that you have made a great first impression on me and my sister, Karen Cannon. My sister called me this morning in Charlotte as she was driving to work in Waynesville. She said, ” you have to go read a blog of a patient of mine because I think you will love her blog”! Boy, was she right! I look forward to digging around and exploring on your blog!!
I am a brand new blogger; therefore, I am just learning!
Have a blessed day!!
~~~rhonda~~~